How Would You Retrofit This Problem ?

[chillerman2006]

Good Evening Gents & Ladies & Install

I need to shall we say retrofit a problem, the problem being I have a tea-leaf in the house, its her sprogg not mine & have suffered many years of funds & objects getting up & just walking off, it tots up to a few 'k' over the years & today was the oak tree that broke the camels back. I got a call from a supplier saying my kite has bounced, yet I know there was plenty of funds in the account to cover it....After checking with the man that likes to say 'no'.. I was informed the account is empty

It turns out there was a online transaction, which has been carried out by me

Doing some digging I find this me, was actually her 19 year old sprogg who has clocked me I presume over many occasions logging in and has noted the log in details.. this obviously can not be done with looking over me shoulder just once as there is a long number (bank supplied) on fisrt page...my own made up number on the second & then the programme asks for 3 numbers at random of another 6 (bank supplied)

My first reaction was not good as can be imagined, but now I am stuck she will not agree to me reporting her little mare & this means the bank will not reinburse & I will have to use a credit card

My question's are how would you deal with this & how would you put an end to this for good...without just up & leaving them to it ???

[james10]

A clip round the ear and report it, that way it is officially theft then the bank will pay you back or you make him carry your vac pump and transformer around for a year

[chillerman2006]

A clip round the ear and report it, that way it is officially theft then the bank will pay you back or you make him carry your vac pump and transformer around for a year

Hi James

I would love to mate,

just the mrs will not have it & he is a she....which just makes things harder still

R's chillerman

[Tesla]

Hi CM
I would definitely report her (little sod) so she will learn from her mistakes other wise it's just like rewarding her and she will do it again and again. 19 years old should be out in the big bad world - I was out at 15 years old.
We all need to be a lot more careful with these cards, I don't do online purchases with the credit card I use a debit card. If you know the tealeaf goes to a certain drawer (of yours) for restocking her funds you could leave a little surprise like a snake, spiders or giant mouse trap - find out what she fears, this will be her weakness. Since you have a computer you could even set up a little camera for a giggle later. Think about the other people who will be hurt with this bad habit if she doesn't learn a lesson from this.
I know it would be a little sneaky but you could set a trap and bide you time to gather evidence.

It's time for covert surveillance and intel gathering.
On another thought it's just not the done thing to nark on family and it's poor morals to steal from your family too. Get her to pay for it.

[Magoo]

Hi Chillerman.
seems you are between a rock and a hard spot, first check your computer for a clocking program, and if on a wireless home network change your access code daily. definitly don't use credit card on the net.
Sit the young lady down and have a serious talk about the facts of her life, and prison life and criminal records etc,etc,. Does she work at all, and where has all the money gone. Include your Mrs in conversation.

[chillerman2006]

Hi CM
I would definitely report her (little sod) so she will learn from her mistakes other wise it's just like rewarding her and she will do it again and again. 19 years old should be out in the big bad world - I was out at 15 years old.
We all need to be a lot more careful with these cards, I don't do online purchases with the credit card I use a debit card. If you know the tealeaf goes to a certain drawer (of yours) for restocking her funds you could leave a little surprise like a snake, spiders or giant mouse trap - find out what she fears, this will be her weakness. Since you have a computer you could even set up a little camera for a giggle later. Think about the other people who will be hurt with this bad habit if she doesn't learn a lesson from this.
I know it would be a little sneaky but you could set a trap and bide you time to gather evidence.

It's time for covert surveillance and intel gathering.
On another thought it's just not the done thing to nark on family and it's poor morals to steal from your family too. Get her to pay for it.

Thanks Tesla for your wise words

Your with my way of thinking totally, I just need to find a way where she is caught red handed but does not involve me actually phoning the police on her...the mrs would never forgive

the funds have been transfered out of my business account via online banking (all details changed now) & due to years of this I have locks on bedroom doors, locked filing cabinets in bedroom & even locked document safes soldered in the bottom of them.. thought I had stopped the problem by making valuables/cash in-accessable

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

Hi Chillerman.
seems you are between a rock and a hard spot, first check your computer for a clocking program, and if on a wireless home network change your access code daily. definitly don't use credit card on the net.
Sit the young lady down and have a serious talk about the facts of her life, and prison life and criminal records etc,etc,. Does she work at all, and where has all the money gone. Include your Mrs in conversation.

Hi Magoo

thanks mate, sadly she has already done the prison life ! all for a £40 pound fine, she is so out of control when the judge asked her how she could pay, she replied he can stick it ! So he locked her up

she dont work, does not recieve benefits just lives here free of charge & I am in the wrong if I say anything...need to think of a way she just hangs herself (not literally of course) & get her out of my life...it can not continue...that was most of my work float she took...left me in a bit of a whole this time, but that will sort itself out in time

R's chillerman

[mikeref]

Blood is thicker than water. Indeed a difficult situation to be in.Twisting this around a little, does she get on well with her mother? Does Mrs. C.M. allow this from her daughter? Something deeply bothers this girl, apart from living the terrible teens, 13 to 19. Need some common ground and lots of patience. If there is a brick wall between you and them, then this can only be brought down over time. This might sound silly but i would find time to get involved with her activities, meaning, to show more than a passing interest in her life. She may feel abandoned and takes her frustrations out on you and the world. look for what interests her, apart from hacking your account. What makes her happy, animals, movies, boys? Slowly, very slowly, the brick wall will erode and she will choose the time and place to confide in you.

[Tesla]

CM this sounds like a serious problem and needs to be sorted quickly. Could be an opportunity for a life change. I wish you the best with this one. You could buy a lotto ticket as you are due some luck.

She's probably eaves dropping on this forum reading our thoughts for her next game plan lol.

[chillerman2006]

Blood is thicker than water. Indeed a difficult situation to be in.Twisting this around a little, does she get on well with her mother? Does Mrs. C.M. allow this from her daughter? Something deeply bothers this girl, apart from living the terrible teens, 13 to 19. Need some common ground and lots of patience. If there is a brick wall between you and them, then this can only be brought down over time. This might sound silly but i would find time to get involved with her activities, meaning, to show more than a passing interest in her life. She may feel abandoned and takes her frustrations out on you and the world. look for what interests her, apart from hacking your account. What makes her happy, animals, movies, boys? Slowly, very slowly, the brick wall will erode and she will choose the time and place to confide in you.

Thanks Mike

Had not looked at it from that angle for a long time (years) & you could be right mate, instead of just abandoning her & looking to punish, find the route cause & try to resolve it from the bottom up....hmm..cheers mate...good food for thought

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

CM this sounds like a serious problem and needs to be sorted quickly. Could be an opportunity for a life change. I wish you the best with this one. You could buy a lotto ticket as you are due some luck.

She's probably eaves dropping on this forum reading our thoughts for her next game plan lol.

Nice one Tesla

lightening the thoughts, she does not have the password's for my pc's (or does she) & is out for the night now

thats got me thinking but i do change the passwords reguarly..so much so I have locked myself out in the past taking all day to remember what I had changed it to

R's chillerman

[nike123]

I would give you my thoughts, but they are totally opposite of everything you already got here.
To cut story, modern upbringing produces more "invalids" than ever.
My retrofit would be something like at this show, but in real life:
http://www.outrightdistribution.com/...-hill-314.aspx

If that could make any change now when she is 19.

[simon@parker]

hello mate not a good thread
this is wot i would do my daughter stole from me recently so i told her she ever did it again would throw her out no second chance she can go live with her mum if she will have her she moved out of her mums because it was bad i also had her and her cousin clean my whole flat for a few days got me cupboards washed inside and out told them if it wasnt good enough they would be doing it untill it was all my ironing done as well think she got message if i had yr problem she would be out door so fast in clothes she stood up in nothing else would change the locks as well yr house yr rules and if you wanted a fitting punishment early afternoon would get her to come with you tell her yr goin for takeout get her to leave her phone or try and makesure battery low drive to an isolated spot 30 ish miles away open door out she goes dense woodland is good scares everyone at nite if she doesnt learn her lesson oh well go 50 miles next time and if she asks why you did it tell her yr expressing yrself and fact yr annoyed at her stealing from you dont go for the namby pamby touchey feely crap life has rules time she learned a few

[chillerman2006]

I would give you my thoughts, but they are totally opposite of everything you already got here.
To cut story, modern upbringing produces more "invalids" than ever.
My retrofit would be something like at this show, but in real life:
http://www.outrightdistribution.com/...-hill-314.aspx

If that could make any change now when she is 19.

Thanks Nike

If nothing else that would give us the chance to move & change our names

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

hello mate not a good thread
this is wot i would do my daughter stole from me recently so i told her she ever did it again would throw her out no second chance she can go live with her mum if she will have her she moved out of her mums because it was bad i also had her and her cousin clean my whole flat for a few days got me cupboards washed inside and out told them if it wasnt good enough they would be doing it untill it was all my ironing done as well think she got message if i had yr problem she would be out door so fast in clothes she stood up in nothing else would change the locks as well yr house yr rules and if you wanted a fitting punishment early afternoon would get her to come with you tell her yr goin for takeout get her to leave her phone or try and makesure battery low drive to an isolated spot 30 ish miles away open door out she goes dense woodland is good scares everyone at nite if she doesnt learn her lesson oh well go 50 miles next time and if she asks why you did it tell her yr expressing yrself and fact yr annoyed at her stealing from you dont go for the namby pamby touchey feely crap life has rules time she learned a few

Thanks Simon

have been down the route of outing her to her fathers but mrs let her back & she came back worse...we can not even get her to keep her own room tidy...one of us does it as we just get sick of asking & the mess, including food on plates is dissgusting...I was toying with Idea that Mike said & try yet again to see it from her side...but have after sleeping on it have told her mum now...thats it they have six months to sort where she is going...but either she does or I am...can not go on & I am obviously fighting a loosing battle.. my hearts just not in it anymore

R's chillerman

[simon@parker]

you cant kill someone with kindness so they keep taking from you suppose i am old fashioned in my views my daughters can live how they like but its my rules under my roof yeah i get it wrong sometimes but i can apollogise and give them back there freedom lol i would still do to her what i said and call police if she aint gonna learn u dont bite the hand that feeds u put her out in the big wide world on her own mate 6months ? sorry yr to nice way to nice just give em ya cash card an pin lol sorry think yr way to generous being harsh as i am would have changed locks this morning my generous side would have put there stuff out front in bin liners and not sold what i could and burned rest but thats me you dont steal from me if my daughters ask they can have it but if they steal no mercy you just dont do it have taught them the rules when they were younger now there older its there choice to live by them or take there own set of rules and live with the KARMA they get . it wont be easy for you so i wish you luck you seem like a nice guy so if you think yr doin wrong thing you probably are same as if you think your doing right thing you probably are an now i am over my rant (sorry) good luck mate

[chillerman2006]

Hi Simon

your appear to have me sust mate, I know I am too soft with her, if she had been a boy it would have been different, if she had been my own I like to think she would have had a better start, being that she is not & has lived here on/off over past 2 decades means we have not had full control over her up bringing...wether or not this would have changed things who knows...it's going to be an uncomfortable six months but I just can not chuck her into the world, just can't do it....I really wish I could

Thanks mate...hopefully we can make better from the 2 younger ones we have from the many wise words that we have recieved...big thanks to all

R's chillerman

[Kev The Tool]

Hi mate,
i think you have to carry out your ultimatum and i would start implementing things earlier, ie: finding her somewhere to live, a job etc, whether you mean it or not she will defo get the message you are serious and she will either learn to stand on her own two feet or she will live under roof under your rules. all the best with whatever you decide, last resort mate i've got a bit of room in my container for you and your gauges.
Kev

[install monkey]

so i know who wears the keks in ur pad!
grow some balls ,when shes next on ur pc -dig out the claw hammer and smash her right fingers,that way she cant press enter. next throw salt in her eyes then she cannot see the computer,or if u do this first then she cant see who hammered her fingers.
next chin her mum for being a bad parent, then go shopping for dried noodles and pot noodles because ur gonna have to cook for a while,change ur bank to barclays then u get a lil card reader so the card holder has to swipe to get a random password ,then get a hole punch on said bank card and get ur nipple peirced,then u know where ur card is at all times. finally,change her shampoo contents for immac,then if that doesnt sort the cow out,i have a last resort!!!! keep me updated for the final master plan! mwah mwah mwah!!!

[install monkey]

if she has nimble fingers-can she flare??

[chillerman2006]

Hi mate,
i think you have to carry out your ultimatum and i would start implementing things earlier, ie: finding her somewhere to live, a job etc, whether you mean it or not she will defo get the message you are serious and she will either learn to stand on her own two feet or she will live under roof under your rules. all the best with whatever you decide, last resort mate i've got a bit of room in my container for you and your gauges.
Kev

Cheers Kev

Is the container insulated for winter & a/c for summer...4 walls sounds like home...they come with twin french doors as well dont they

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

so i know who wears the keks in ur pad!
grow some balls ,when shes next on ur pc -dig out the claw hammer and smash her right fingers,that way she cant press enter. next throw salt in her eyes then she cannot see the computer,or if u do this first then she cant see who hammered her fingers.
next chin her mum for being a bad parent, then go shopping for dried noodles and pot noodles because ur gonna have to cook for a while,change ur bank to barclays then u get a lil card reader so the card holder has to swipe to get a random password ,then get a hole punch on said bank card and get ur nipple peirced,then u know where ur card is at all times. finally,change her shampoo contents for immac,then if that doesnt sort the cow out,i have a last resort!!!! keep me updated for the final master plan! mwah mwah mwah!!!

Install you should do stand up mate, I like the immac idea, maybe in the conditioner she likes to leave on her long hair for an hour, she would flip...took her years to grow that

R's chillerman

Ps: just in case that don't work...whats the final master plan ???

[install monkey]

it involves rohypnal,sticking pins in her arms and syringes. also burn spoons and bits of foil get her in drug rehab! - i am parent of the year!!!-you need to teach her who the boss is!!

[chillerman2006]

it involves rohypnal,sticking pins in her arms and syringes. also burn spoons and bits of foil get her in drug rehab! - i am parent of the year!!!-you need to teach her who the boss is!!

I'll ask my boss (mrs ) if we can book her in for 'Install's Instant Rehabilitation Services' am sure she will not want to take a re-test !


R's chillerman

[install monkey]

its not cheap but it has a proven track record! the current scholars are locked in my basement!!!haha

I'll ask my boss (mrs ) if we can book her in for 'Install's Instant Rehabilitation Services' am sure she will not want to take a re-test !


R's chillerman

[Magoo]

Hi Chillerman.
going back to earlier post, I like the idea of breaking down the wall concept, give her a job carrying your tools and teaching her the trade, busy people are happy people. They come round to the idea that there is a purpose in life, for my mind there is no such thing as afree lunch, we all work to stay alive.
magoo

[mikeref]

Hi Chillerman.
going back to earlier post, I like the idea of breaking down the wall concept, give her a job carrying your tools and teaching her the trade, busy people are happy people. They come round to the idea that there is a purpose in life, for my mind there is no such thing as afree lunch, we all work to stay alive.
magoo

G,day Magoo.There are ways, then, there are ways. Changing the mood alittle, i remember the school days when the "cane" was still allowed. most i had was one on each hand. Others were getting the full 6, they never learned. The cane, maybe some out there do not know of this flexible piece of Bamboo kept in Principals office. Hurt like hell .Think school is too soft these days and kids are growing up knowing they can get away with just about anything. Too late i think for C.M, so now the approach i said before is how i'd go about it.. Just my opinion though .

[Magoo]

Hi Mikeref.
I have vivid memories of the "cane ". Only happened once after creating havic in a chemistry class. Suddenly became the MODEL student. Friggen hurt something terrible., tried to make some potassiun nitrate and dropped a bit on the floor, well the explosion/ noise was more than I expected, bugger. The incident was reported in end of year report back to parents unfortunantly. I was grounded for what seemed decades at the time. A two pronged punishment. Years later met up with teacher and he instantly reminded me, we both had a good laugh about. He was amazed I was still alive.

[mikeref]

Having a laugh now, but not at the time. Would have liked to be the fly on the wall to see that incident. I had to sit up front next to a trouble maker in maths class. He wouldn't shut up and the teacher would then kick our table and send our books flying as well as giving him (trouble maker) a wrap over the knuckles with the steel ruler. .

[chillerman2006]

Hi Chillerman.
going back to earlier post, I like the idea of breaking down the wall concept, give her a job carrying your tools and teaching her the trade, busy people are happy people. They come round to the idea that there is a purpose in life, for my mind there is no such thing as afree lunch, we all work to stay alive.
magoo

Thanks Magoo

would not let her near me tools though - she would probaly drop them on purpose or sell them, to a passer by

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

its not cheap but it has a proven track record! the current scholars are locked in my basement!!!haha

Install

This is probaly the only sort of approach that would kirb this little mare's ways....but then again I see above the cane being mentioned....I got it 48 times in 1st 2 years of secondry school & just thought it funny....like having a nice rear end tatoo to show all the girls ! Did not work for me...made me worse ... especially as me ole man used that approach but a lot harder .... it just builds resentment that stays with you for life, rather than help to teach you right from wrong ... never really punish the kids in any way apart from take their pride possesions for a period of time ... always tried the reward when good approach ... have spent toooo much time now on this one .... 19 & as Tesla has said - time to make her own way in the big world ... no more free ride ... get out, get on with it !

R's chillerman

[install monkey]

can she flare??

[chillerman2006]

can she flare??

Mate she can not do much ! accept thieve ... cooking, cleaning, washing up, ironing, ect ect, they are all beyond her lazy little a_ss...but she is going to have to learn quick !

[install monkey]

bet she could flare in less than 4 attempts!!

[chillerman2006]

I bet she could not...we have a major clear up to do, when she makes a cup of tea ....sure she just does it on purpose

this is not a joke mate !

its a kids whole life & future on the line here

[install monkey]

my lads like that,messy lil f**ker but he doesnt nick owt of me cause the boss has spent it all,u gotta sort out ur bank stuff first. she could be messy due to poor hand/eye coordination.maybe a balance problem,then social etticate training including how to bake a cake,socialising skills and how to bag someone thats minted to palm her off.
job done

[chillerman2006]

Yeah, banks sorted mate...stopped online account till she gone .... the mess, am sure is done on purpose as she soon manages to do all her makeup when going out & that takes a steady hand...we have tried & tried showing her how to cook .. have got friends & families kids to take her out with them ... she just throws it all back ... spiteful little madam, that just enjoys hurting people ... even seen a shrink ... & he has said she has no excuse for her behaviour ... took her football with friends that get in VIP area after match, she tried nicking someones flash phone ! Even the cat & dogs don't like her .... I can see her having a real sh_ite life ... but don't know how can help anymore ... beyond me
Needs brain & blood retrofit ... all I can think of now !

[install monkey]

overspoilt during childhood,bet u in a few years she'll be married with a kid and swanning round in a x5.
u didnt say what she had bought! i dont think u can blame her for buying a thrust bearing and oil pump for a trane recip.
did u tell ur misses that the meal/feed with that young horse was her restaurant bill?-tip use cash for fishing.

[chillerman2006]

overspoilt during childhood.

You got it Mate,

Have made sure she had everything within reason, always good brand gear aswell, no cheap stuff & this is probaly where I have gone wrong...too spoilt .... dont envey her hubby when she gets one ... he is gonna have to drape her in diamonds & still I bet she empties his wallet ... such a shame though as she had so much going for her ... a real shame !

[install monkey]

my 13yr old daughter has jedi skills in mind control-the mrs took her in clarks for school shoes,she started swearing that she aint sitting with a load of 7yr olds and she used her skills to manipulate a shopping trip to the kickers shop, £70 later she was happy and she doesnt make a mess when brewing up,mainly because she wont brew up for anyone.

[paul_h]

i) I have a random number generator key chain thing needed to do online transfers that my bank supplies for $5/m
2) With paypal I have set it up so a code that is SMS'ed to me is needed to proceed with any transaction
pi) I don't even have any kids/steps, this is just what I do anyway
infinity) I hope to never have this problem and move out to the country before I have kids...

[RSTC]

Seems to be an all too familiar story Chillerman. The stealing may be a symptom of a more fundamental problem.

Whatever chance you have of moving forward you need to make sure that yourself and Mrs Chillerman (Chillergal?) are working together and always saying the same things.

Little Miss C will exploit any fissure to maintain her lifestyle.

Work on your relationship with Mrs Chillerman talk listen talk listen talk listen. Discuss options and opportunities. Avoid blame (it's pointless: nobody wakes up in the morning and thinks 'I'll skew my daughters view of the world').

Best of luck

[chillerman2006]

She should be glad we dont live in indonesia

http://www.bestgore.com/all-the-gore/page/2/

Video's at the bottom of page ............ bet they dont suffer too much with tea-leafs !!!

[install monkey]

u could always go for a week or even the day!!!- oh that was sick!!!

She should be glad we dont live in indonesia

http://www.bestgore.com/all-the-gore/page/2/

Video's at the bottom of page ............ bet they dont suffer too much with tea-leafs !!!

[paul_h]

http://www.bestgore.com/all-the-gore/page/2/

OK, don't go to this website unless you want to see splattered remains of people in crashes, executions, dismemberments, beheadings etc. edit: And a literal version of a 'spit roast' of a girl.

[simon@parker]

mr chillerman yr treating her like a fridge trying to fix her and unfortunately some people cant be fixed thats like a fridge sometimes ya have to give up as time an parts required are way over wot its worth not a good example but sometimes you have to walk away if theres a good person inside her she will come good and come back or she wont

[mikeref]

OK, don't go to this website unless you want to see splattered remains of people in crashes, executions, dismemberments, beheadings etc. edit: And a literal version of a 'spit roast' of a girl.

Ah, too late!! Already been there! C.M. ?? Thats horrible.

[chillerman2006]

i) I have a random number generator key chain thing needed to do online transfers that my bank supplies for $5/m
2) With paypal I have set it up so a code that is SMS'ed to me is needed to proceed with any transaction
pi) I don't even have any kids/steps, this is just what I do anyway
infinity) I hope to never have this problem and move out to the country before I have kids...

Thanks Paul

I have seen the card readers & rang up for one months ago...will have to chase it up

unless it has arrived and she has got it ... room search in the morning I think

R's chillerman

[chillerman2006]

Seems to be an all too familiar story Chillerman. The stealing may be a symptom of a more fundamental problem.

Whatever chance you have of moving forward you need to make sure that yourself and Mrs Chillerman (Chillergal?) are working together and always saying the same things.

Little Miss C will exploit any fissure to maintain her lifestyle.

Work on your relationship with Mrs Chillerman talk listen talk listen talk listen. Discuss options and opportunities. Avoid blame (it's pointless: nobody wakes up in the morning and thinks 'I'll skew my daughters view of the world').

Best of luck

Thanks RSTC

It is quite common I think though most keep it quiet(I dont do embarressed), but I always thought it was younger kids that try it & grow out of the habit & learn before they are 19...have had a good laugh today...& maybe can give her yet another chance & talk to her, it's the silent treatment at the moment...too soft...been a boy would have neck rung...the cups of tea have been flowing all day which helps show she knows its wrong but not sure she really cares...just going through the motions I think...was all for up & leaving meself at one point as if it was not for my credit cards she would have took me under this time but why should we all suffer for her ... one thing I have noticed is she is very jealous...I can not buy the dogs a toy without faces off her...need to look again at all the replys...take what I can from them & see what I can work out as possible cause, then see if I can rectify the problem/s

Thanks All

R's chillerman

[Magoo]

Hi Chiller man.
you are definitly between a rock and a hard spot.
What about that TV program about difficult teenagers, you are open and radical, sounds like like a last option, seems like if the "she " the daughter is willing it might wake her up to things in life. If not she may go away.
Talk to TV channels about it.
My kids have watched them and are totally for it type exposure. I had only one occassion that a wack in the ear was necessary at 18 years old, I figured it had to happen when he was shorter than me and was the last chance before he wacked me back.