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chillin out
21-03-2006, 11:20 PM
A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughters bedroom. When she opened the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.

"What are you doing?" She exclaimed.

The daughter replied, "I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband."

Later that week, the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming sound coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on a sofa with her vibrator.

"What are you doing?" He exclaimed.

The daughter replied, "I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband."

A couple of days later the mother heard the humming sound again, this time coming from the den. Upon entering the room, she found her husband watching television with the vibrator buzzing away beside him.

"What are you doing" She asked.

He replied, "Watching the game with my son-in-law."

Chillin:) :)

phil68
22-03-2006, 06:54 PM
Don't suppose you've got this woman's address have you?:D :D

Tycho
22-03-2006, 07:23 PM
hehehe :)

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One morning, Kevin wakes up to find his dog dead, lying next to his bed. He can't quite believe it, so decides to take him to the vet. The Vet takes one look at the dog and says, "Kevin, I'm truly sorry, but your dog is dead."

"No. He can't be dead. I demand a second opinion!" replies Kevin.

The doctor nods and agrees. He goes into the back room and brings out a cat. The cat jumps all over the dog, bites it, looks at the vet and says, "Meow."

The vet again says, "I'm sorry but your dog is truly dead."

Kevin says, "No!, I don't believe it, I want another opinion."

The vet nods and brings out a Labrador Retriever, which then begins to jump all over the dead dog, tugging at it before barking, "Woof roof woof!"

The vet says, "Sir, your dog is dead. That will be 400 dollars."

" to tell me my dog is dead?" asks Kevin.

"Well," the vet replies, "I charge 50 dollars, the cat scan is 200 and the lab test is 150 dollars..."

phil68
22-03-2006, 09:16 PM
A guy runs into a golf course club house frantically asking if there's a doctor among the members.
Another guy at the bar pipes up 'Yes, I'm a doctor, what's the problem?'
The worried guy replies 'I've hit a woman with my golf ball'
The doctor asks 'where did you hit her?'
'Between the first & second hole' the guy replies
Doctor; 'Well you haven't left much room for a plaster then have you?!'
:D